This post begins the first in our series: The only variant may be when an additional archetypal layer is added due to an affair, during which delicate emotions may seem to be wrapped in barbed wire.
The archetype topic Infidelity will be explored in a future article. Another constant in divorce is the pain, shame, and grief that each partner will experience. These are usually heavy-duty feelings that can rock the boat in even the most amicable process. The Initiator profile is just what it sounds like, you are the one to ask for a divorce.
In most cases, an Divorce initiator emotions has reached this decision because you can no longer stay in a marriage as it is, and the longer you stay, the worse it seems to get.
You may have been thinking about "Divorce initiator emotions" options for a long time. You have likely tried to communicate with your spouse, but feel unheard and unseen.
At Wevorce, we have found that most Initiators has finally reached the point where they just want to be free to move beyond the constant struggle. Despite the fact that you are probably ready to get the "Divorce initiator emotions" process over with quickly and move on, your partner is most likely at square one. They will need time to grieve the loss of the marriage, to reach the point where they can move past their anger and heal the pain.
Slow yourself down and allow them to catch up.
Remember, there is a difference between an action and a reaction. To act upon something is a conscious decision. To react is an automatic response to something, generally stemming from and expressed through emotions. "Divorce initiator emotions" the Initiator, your decision has likely been made over time and you act upon this decision. When you ask your spouse for a divorce, whether it comes as a total surprise or not, they will react to your decision.
But first, be certain of what you want. Also, a person should never threaten divorce without intent, or take the issue lightly. Will your spouse be surprised? If so, are you prepared for what they will say, and the questions they will ask?
Asking for a Divorceshe has six tips to help break the news. Presumably you want to find a middle ground between slipping away in the night and booking the Wednesday slot on Maury Povich for a surprise announcement. The Reactor profile is the Divorce initiator emotions, you are the one being asked for a divorce.
A Reactor will probably feel powerless when faced with the possibility of losing his or her life partner and home. Because the Initiator has had Divorce initiator emotions time to think about their decision and is better prepared to move forward, you may feel like an influx of emotions is tearing you apart. You may also feel victimized, and anger and pain may prompt you to place blame, either on yourself or your spouse.
You may think your spouse just woke up one day and decided to ask for a divorce, that the decision was an impulsive, easy way for Divorce initiator emotions to escape the problems "Divorce initiator emotions" have conceived exist in your marriage.
But the opposite is most likely true; we often see that Initiators have been struggling for a long time and they see divorce as their last resort. People make decisions for two reasons: Instead, it helps to take an honest look at your relationship. Did the marriage Divorce initiator emotions all your needs? Or are you looking back at your history through rose-colored glasses and seeing it how you wanted it to be, rather than how it truly was?
Were there certain signs along the way that you may have missed? Or is it possible that you hoped the problems in your marriage would just quietly go away? At the same time, try to be gentle with yourself. When presented with the prospect of divorce, most find themselves reeling from emotional and lifestyle changes. After all, you are grieving the end of your marriage.
Give yourself time to digest the emotions and get past them so you can approach the future grounded and make sound decisions. Worthy of repeating here is his insight: You can act out your immediate feelings, and get short-term emotional satisfaction, or you can manage those feelings and pursue long-term interests.
You can almost never do both. Both an Initiator and Reactor will have his or her own version of what happened to erode the marriage. Agree you will not have a pointless discussion detailing those versions and try to figure out who is more at fault.
Do not play the blame game. Understand that it takes two to get to the point of divorce.
How you divorce is as important as how you married. We are bombarded with information on how to attract a partner, but not so much on how to divorce, especially in a healthy, productive way. If we put as much thought, time, and effort into the difficult process of undoing the vows as we did to saying them, we can have a successful divorce and set the tone for happy single lives.
Divorce is a difficult, grueling process of untangling lives, so be sure to give each other respect and kindness. As impossible as it may seem, try to accept that it is over and move on with grace. This may mean saying goodbye to what you had together, but it also entails welcoming what is to come as an individual knowing the end of a marriage means a new beginning. By Divorce initiator emotions letting go of the emotions binding you to the happily ever afters found in fairy tales, you will take an important step: When facing divorce or separation with a new focus, this perspective will get you through the uncoupling in a gentle, more informed way.
We call that a Wevorce. Schedule a time to Divorce initiator emotions. Email us at welcome wevorce.
Based on your responses, it sounds like you're ready for the next chapter. Wevorce's online self-guided divorce would be a great option for you and your spouse.
Your ability to communicate with your spouse makes you great candidates for an amicable, colloraborative divorce. You may also consider adding an hour or two with our expert financial professionals to help you and your spouse work through any financial challenges. You may also consider adding an hour or two with our family architects to help you and your spouse work through any parenting challenges.
You may also consider adding an hour or two with our mediation and legal experts to help you and your spouse work through any communication and legal challenges. You and your spouse should be able to effectively work together through our Divorce initiator emotions and create debt and asset division agreements with our financial mapping tools. Based on your responses, it sounds like you might need some more time to decide whether divorce is the right solution for your family.
Our blog offers a wide range of resources for all stages of relationships. Should You Stay in Marriage? Our online divorce solution could save you thousands. Take our short quiz to Divorce initiator emotions if you qualify.
Are you currently thinking about divorce? Wevorce is dedicated to changing divorce for good.
Learn more about how we can help. Who Gets the Eggs? Determining Embryo Ownership in a Divorce. Does Divorce Damage Infants and Toddlers? Are you ready for the next chapter and need help Divorce initiator emotions your divorce?
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Our Assessment Based on your responses, it sounds like you're ready for the next chapter. Chat with us online. Get Started See how it works. You may find this blog article helpful. Divorce causes negative emotions and grief. Here are the 6 emotional stages those who divorce go through.